UNDERGROUND ANIMALS & PARIS HILTON "Paris", cd
There is no greater target today when it comes to questionable media celebrity attention. This is itself is an interesting statement because the person in question has a frame that would seem to have the ability to slip by unnoticed through crowds, cracks between walls, and through shower drains. Even more interesting when you know that this woman's two dimensional frame is trumped by the practically concentration camp-esque body of her former partner in television crime, and daughter of actually talented Lionel Ritchie, who we know as Nicole Ritchie.

Why did we allow this high society porn star into the hearts and minds of america? Why do we celebrate her inability to produce any kind of talent at all. Honestly, you can't blame her at all. No, not one bit. She's just going through the motions. She's doing just what you want her to do whether you love her or hate her. I don't blame her for all this. Honestly would you be surprised if you woke up tomorrow and saw on the news that a new video tape was found where Paris can be seen having sex with Ashton, her own sister, DJ Quin, a show pony, and a tree? You really wouldn't. And for some people they would love it so that they could cry out about how horrible this woman is. "Look! Look! See?!? I told you she was horrible!!!" I say, "whatever," and roll my eyes.

Yes the blame for Paris Hilton and her "newsworthy" antics rests squarely on your neighbors;...the people you don't talk to very much down the street who wash their souped up hondas, the middle americans who think they are better than her when they laugh at her inability to milk a cow and yet continue to watch Fox Television even when the show is over, your little sister - or even worse, your BIG sister, the curious lookie-loos who say "well, I have to see what this is all about and laugh about it later,"...and yes YOU for talking about what trash she is while you eat dinner in a public restaurant.

So is Danger Mouse and the UK Graffiti artist's remix of the Paris Hilton aimed at her or is it aimed at you, the consumer? I tend to think that it's more about the people who buy her album than the woman herself.

If you haven't heard about this, let me sum it up for you. It was discovered (or was it more of an announcement?) that infamously anonymous Graffiti artist Banksy and DJ Danger Mouse had gone into several record stores in the UK and replaced about 500 of Paris' debut albums with their own version of her album. Not really a remix, but a 40 minute almost endless generic beat accompanied by Paris saying "That's Hot" with the occasional Paris quote. It rarely changes until 23 minutes into the track where the music shifts into some classical italian mandolin picking. This goes on for a couple minutes until Paris seemingly gets bored saying, "This is so lame." and the music returns to the now familiar beat and doesn't stop until 40 minutes and 6 seconds have passed. The cover is photoshopped to make Paris appear nude. They were very generous with her chest. Most of us have seen enough of her to know how she resembles a boy, more than anything. The inside is decorated with fun little phrases like "Every CD you buy puts me further out of your league" accompanied by various photoshopped images of Paris Hilton turning her head into a dog, her body into a mannequin, or having her get out of her car in Skid Row. Gotta love that Banksy! The music is generic and empty...and this was all they needed for their commentary on her work.

And that's all you need of mine on theirs. They've said enough for everyone.
underground animals; www.artistdirect.com

, cd
the first thing that catches your eye is the interesting cover art. that alone is half the battle when your work in a store. very 70's punk meets new wave. i like it.

the music is good too, although i think something should have been done differently with the vocals to make them gel better. the vocals are just a little too clean and loud and feel like they should be a lot looser instead of "bar band" as they come off here. i prescribe a regiment of sleeping with her head at the foot of her bed for a few weeks and bouncing around with friends in the back of the car before shows, starting pointless arguments about how harry potter movies kicked the ass of the spy kids movies. trust me, i know what i'm talking about. get this for prom night.
no fun records

, cd
what a weird band. and that is a lot coming from me. the opening track "someday there will come a time" reminds me of both elvis costello and the movie version of grease. the next track "fallin' off the depths sounds like a high pitched mr. costello being backed up by madness (circa their first album).. yes, ladies and gentlemen, we are officially listening to an eclectic band. remember that feeling when you first heard the dickees? the feeling is very similar here. there are some pretty good songs too. "comin' on fast" may be my favorite on the album. i just can't tell if they would be fun to watch live. especially after i just compared them to the dickees. better take a sniff of coffee first to clear my palette the next time they come to town.

so the album is pretty good, but i do have to take issue with the album art. i just don't like it. if i saw this in the store and i have never heard them before there is no way that i'd pick this up or even steal it. the album artwork is pretty bad all throughout the cd in fact. maybe they just wanted to sell this to blind people? if so, there is some honor to that i suppose. i think they're just going to have to hire me to design the next one. so i say, until then, pick up this album, tear out all the art and make your own and you enjoy the fun and silly sound of

, ep cd
i love it! from the first beat and guitar strums in the song "dropped down", this band has already won me over. luckily the vocals were just as good too. this is just the kind of band we like to feature in no-fi "magazine". i only wish this were a full length album rather than just an e.p..

it's hard to place a band like this, but if you were a fan of third grade teacher, that dog. or even early veruca salt, you would probably like this album. the lyrics are playful and they sound like they are having fun. i liked the minimal keyboard too. something like this could have been easily overproduced, but it sounds great. i hope they keep the sound on their next album though. don't you hate it when you like a band's album and then their next album sounds like it was recorded in an airtight recording studio made of gold and crystal? let's hope that doesn't happen to eagle and talon. i can't wait to hear what they come up with next.

, cd
what is it with early dolphin that makes us keep reviewing their album's late? for as much as i like this album, i apologize for the delay. (for everyone, really, as we have been behind lately.) call me "late dolphin" i guess.

the first thing that catches your eye is the ultra-spiffy artwork, inside and out. the colors are reminiscent of drawings i've seen of the early west. it doesn't stop there though as the music is just as pretty as the artwork surrounding it. most of it is mellow, but nice. sort of a mix of beechwood sparks and mudhoney. yeah, i know that's a weird mix. my favorite tracks on this cd are "another movie," "cycles," and the album opener "go where you want to go." the closing acoustic guitar title track "swim" is a pretty way to end the album. get this album to listen to while you sleep on the beech.

, ep cd
i saw this band play live at the smell during the special "new wave fuck fest" night where they played with bubonic plague and new collapse. i was very impressed and introduced myself to their contact person while they were still playing. got the album and here we are.

it's always a worry if the recorded versions of those songs you like hearing live will live up to the stage sound. in the case of this album, they did a great job in capturing the live sound. a lot of credit goes to the way the vocals were handled. junior metro's voice doesn't lose much of its power in the studio. it's sharp and you feel the meaning behind every word. a bit of screamers, a bit of minor threat, a bit of fugazi, a bit of the clash, you can hear the influences there, but they really do make their sound their own and it feels good to listen to it. this is an excellent introduction to fifty on their heels and i hope to hear a full length follow-up soon. heck, i want to hear it tomorrow! can you make that happen guys? get this for your next airplane flight. record it to tape so you can hear it during takeoff.
cat dirt records

, double cd
Is this really hawnay troof? mr. vice cooler seems so less happy...or,...well,...horny than the last album. this album has a much heavier theme and thus feels much more mature and personal. it's a pretty big risk for a double album by somebody who is not yet that well known. but you know what? it works.

the music on this new double album may be his best work yet. imagine if frank zappa decided to produce a rap album. this is probably what it would sound like. it's still playful, but definitely more mature than the last one. frankly, while i liked it, i did consider hawnay troof to be more of a novelty act when i got the first album. and, sure, there is plenty of novelty in his act, but lots of talent too and i hope that this album takes him far.

get this album for a night of dancing and dinner. with 2 cds to choose from, you can even spread it over a couple of nights. and, yes, i do mean spread it.
retard disco

, cd
what happens when a popular indie performer decides to have a party on cd where he invites all of his friends to play with him? you get a cd like this, in the vein of the mike watt and frank sinatra duet albums. kristian performs with russell mael (of sparks), ann magnuson, stew (of the negro problem), abby travis, paul reubens (aka pee wee herman), el vez, lydia lunch, anna waronker (of that dog.), rufus wainwright, and more. the songs are playful and almost convey a strange circus-like atmosphere. in "get it right this time" (with anna waronker) you can almost imagine people flying on the trapeze. sad clowns would perform during "scarecrow" (with rufus wainwright). I was hoping to hear more from paul reubens on this, but his introduction to the next song in "sex choir prologue" is pretty funny. ann magnuson's voice is amazing in her duet with kristian in "sex in heaven", but you can pretty much say ann magnuson's voice is amazing in anything.

it's weird that i got this in the mail so late from when they first released it, but it's still an interesting album and makes for good dinner (or dinner party) music.

, cd
so the first thing i have to wonder is if the "its" in the band's name is supposed to be possessive. if so, just what is "it" and why does it need revenge? I guess it would have to be possessive since english states that, in the case of the word "it," adding an apostrophe like "it's" would cause it to mean "it is revenge" as the word it has different rules for adding an apostrophe-s after "it" than other words that use the apostrophe to signify that something is possessive as in "the band's mistake." perhaps they are talking about cousin it of the addams family? it think it is very thoughtful of the band its revenge to bring this common issue to the forefront of the music world.

Oh, and the music is ok, but it sounds like it was influenced more by commercial boy "punk" bands than anything actually interesting. not that horrible, but not really spectacular either. my homework for them is to lock themselves in a hot room for a week with only one bottle of water per day and two live chickens and one cooked turkey with black flag, bad brains, and huggy bear being pumped into the room. that'll punk them up for a better follow-up. why just keep doing the same thing?

, double cd
are you plagued by giant monsters attacking your town? or even worse, maybe they're attacking each other in your town. well some people got together to write songs about those very giant monsters and robots who cause so much death and destruction. as it turned out there were so many people affected by the epidemic that they were able to fill two cds with songs by an army of bands.

basically here we are in ultra-nrrrd territory. bands like the robot subwaymen, minya, exit mindbomb, pilots of japan, atomic raygun attack!!, and more lend their services to this cd which was released in conjunction with super 7 magazine (a magazine i must admit i am a fan of). most of the music falls within the punk or electronic music genres. overall it's pretty good, but there are a few songs in there that made me wonder why they were there (especially some of the home computer instrumentals). again, like hawney troof, with two discs, you risk a bigger failure, but i think the people at go hero did a good job and nobody who is fighting off giant monsters out of their backyards should go without this one.
go hero

, cd
new york hardcore in the early eighties. there are many bands we've heard of like black flag, bad brains, and yes, even the beastie boys started off that way. there are still a lot of bands that we'll probably never hear of that were popular back then...some even not so popular. major conflict is a great example of those bands that existed for a short time and we never had a chance to get to know them, much less hear them on your friends stereo at a party. maybe you saw an album or bootleg at a record store sometime, but never bothered to pick it up. it's common, but sad when the lack of word of mouth or some "catchy" cover art keeps you from picking it up. the songs on this long delayed release capture that moment when it was cool to be loose and crazy on stage instead of focusing on how your bandmate are harmonizing with you. since when did so-called punk bands think they needed to sing like the beach boys? if you call yourself punk rock and you don't scare me in some way (other than being scared at how misused the idea of punk is), then you, my friend, are not a punk band. major conflict was a punk band and should be heard...even though they are now long long gone. this is a collection of almost everything that exists on tape. from studio to live tracks and some singles in between. why not go to to your local independent record store and pick this up right now? then you can listen to it on the way to the club.
mad at the world

, cd
minmae are back and already they get an a+ for album art by jesse ledoux (all throughout the cd). they obviously understand how to make my eyes happy, but what about my ears?

the answer is my ears are very very happy. imagine if pavement, spiritualized, and the burning sofa #10 got together and formed a monster band. that's minmae. this album is so good that i can already imagine it being up for no-fi "magazine" album of the year. it's moody, the vocals are perfect, and the music would be perfect for a camping trip in the mountains in the darkest part of the forest. some of my favorite tracks here are "everyone knows jesus wore a chain", "the zero sum", and the opener "cold room, so. pacific". get this before your friends do so that you can be the one to introduce it to them first.
greyday records

, cd
here's a band a lot of people are falling in love with, but i can't just fall in line like that. sure, there are interesting things going on here, but the songs lack the one thing that i appreciate in songs the most: personality.

these aren't bad songs, but much like too much of today's popular music, most of the songs are interchangeable and it feels like the singer is just hurrying to get through them. an apathetic wall of sound that falls on sleepy ears. there is such a thing as too perfect. even the beatles knew when to leave things be. they also knew how to make each of their songs sound different from the other. i strain to understand what they are singing about, but since it's all done in the same style about different subjects, i'm just led to believe that things don't affect them very much. if you are so disaffected, then why bother to make an album? sometimes i think certain musicians should consider becoming paper maché artists. get this album to let your guests know that the party is over.
sink & stove records

, cd
the first track on this cd "thanks, jasmine" is actually the most deceiving. it sets you up for an album that isn't the one you'll actually hear. it's mellow and driving and you think the rest of the songs will fall in line, but, refreshingly, the styles seem to change with each track. there are two primary singers in this group. the guy is matt and is a star cross between nick cave and black francis. the gal is alison and her style is seemingly influenced by country-blues with a teeny bit of courtney love thrown in. i tend to like matt's vocals better, but that's just me. allison has some interesting songs as well, but i think matt's vocals gel with the music a little better.

the album has an interesting rawness to it. i don't know if i'd find myself listening to this in one sitting ever again. but a track here and there would be cool. they're doing the right things, but most of the songs don't quite catch me. maybe i just need to see them live for the real experience. get this for playing in the background as you fix your scooter.
greyday records

, cd
i was excited to see this album in the mail as their first album "meet the weegs" was excellent. this album is still good (even great), but it does have problems when compared to the previous one. the songs aren't as hooky, nor kooky. some even seem like they'd sound better live than the way they sound on this album. "sixty-five mph" sounds like the make-up teamed up with 70's era devo. You might have gotten away with calling this a short album...if it weren't for the 46 minute "the million sounds." which is an epic in feedback, sparse drums, and electronic noise. it's interesting background, but not something i would attempt to sing for your grandparents.

the artwork is certainly better than their last album (which wasn't bad; ...just done before). it's hard to imagine how they can play with all of those things hanging off of their faces. this is a fine follow-up to their last album, but i hope the next one offers something more.
hungry eye records

, cd
xrayok have a sound that sounds like a mix of different genres. there are parts that sound like they were made for a movie soundtrack and others that sound like a jumble of ideas from the 80's and 90's.

i really like the song "smile" that we've played on no-fi "radio". there does seem to be a formula to a lot of the songs on this 6 song e.p.. most of the tracks start with some ambient keyboard or sound that then changes to a faster beat. they aren't bad but a few of the tracks are almost interchangeable. I'd be interested in hearing a full length to see if they can change it up a bit more.

overall this is an ok album. not bad, just not too varied. get this for when you are desperately running somewhere to save your friends from a villain or running away from teenage vampires in santa carla.

all reviews by chris beyond

Generally, we like to receive 2 copies of everything (1 for review and one for possible airplay on No-Fi "Radio"). Please do not send original masters, nor any payola (we do like stickers and any other promotional materials though). DO NOT send us MP3s via e-mail. We would accept them on CD or zip disc, but our e-mail accounts can not handle the size of MP3s at this time.